Yell at your daughter when she spills water on the table.
Yell at her some more when she cries because you’re yelling at her.
Yell that there’s no reason to be upset, it’s just water for the love of God.
***
Yell at your son when he drips water on the floor because he got out of the bath and went to his bedroom to get a bath toy.
When he tries to clean up his water mess, yell at him for using a clean towel instead of a rag.
When he gets a rag and tries again, yell that he’s dripping more water on the floor and can’t he use his brain and dry himself off before he makes an even bigger mess for the love of all that’s holy?
When he starts to cry and says, “I’m sorry, Mama, I’m so sorry,” drop an f-bomb, go to your bedroom, throw yourself on the bed, scream into the mattress, and wonder what on earth is the matter with you – do you have a water phobia or something? Or are you really just that much of a freak of nature that you would yell at young children because they spilled water?
Get off the bed, take a deep breath, and go apologize to your children. Feel like the most unworthy parent in history when they hug you and say, “It’s okay, Mama, I know you weren’t yelling on the inside.”
I’ve had days like that. My children haven’t quite yet developed the verbal skills to start throwing the obscenities back at me but that could happen any day now. Of course, I just left Miranda on a movie trailer site to watch the “Marmaduke” trailer for the 40th time and looked away and when I came back she was watching trailers for movies that were really bad like “Kick-Ass” and “Resident Evil 4.” Yikes!
Kimberlee, you have the sweetest kids.
I think the part that makes you a *good* mom is that you talked to them afterwards. Everyone has their bad days, and everyone gets upset for no good reason. I know my own bad days, where I lose control, have become a lot more frequent since I’ve been pregnant, and I’m not even carrying twins or caring for two small children! The way you set a good example for your kids isn’t by never having a bad day, it’s by being willing to admit that you made a mistake, and apologize for it. They knew you weren’t yelling on the inside because you’ve already modeled a spirit of love and humility for them in the past, and so they know that they can trust you, even when you’re having a bad day.
All I have time to say is that I love you and your “heart-on-your-sleeve” self. Thanks for reminding me that everyone has “those days.”
I think another title for this post could be “How To Feel Like Every Other Parent In The History Of The World Has Felt At One Time Or Another.”
I have had many a moment like this the past month! Everything is a season and it will get better (atleast that’s what I keep TRYING to tell myself!).